He broke up with me, and it hurt as much as breakups do, but I got over it. —Exes Became A Couple Avoid them for now, EBAC, and get over yourself. The first—let’s call him Mitt—I dated for five months.This is especially true in a relationship that ends abruptly.
Sometimes people date the ex's friend as a form of retaliation. Except, of course, that stinking jerk who dumped you. —Ask The forbidden fruit always looks juicy and delicious (insert Eden pun here) but not all that glitters is gold.
The question is whether you can act on that sweet sound of "click." First and foremost, let's make sure you have good intentions. You're the smartest, funniest and best dressed at the office—everyone is mad crushing on you. Gee whiz, that hottie friend of your ex seems to notice . It's a mess to be sure, but that's different than being a horrible person We don’t own people; we just share our time with them . A great relationship, and great chemistry between two people, can be rare to come by.
Said ex probably likes people who share similar qualities (mountain biking! ) and you guys have probably all pal-ed around together for months, maybe even years; it makes that you might be attracted to ex's friend. For all you know, your ex just wasn't that into it and might be stoked to see you move on to someone who's better suited for you. Accusations and tears may flow as freely as the alcohol that you're likely consuming. Don't self loathe, wallow or spiral into misery, that's not gonna make anyone's pain go away and it sure as hell isn't going to pave a smooth foundation for your new love-fest. If I break up with someone — and I have broken up and been broken up with a lot — I have no problem with any of my friends dating my ex, falling in love with her and even marrying her.
I’m not suggesting that their more-probable-than-not breakup should delight you, EBAC, only that you might not want to burn bridges because—college being college, gay men being gay men—you could wind up dating one or the other or both of these guys again.
Or, more likely, you might want to be friends with one or the other or both of them once your hurt has burned off.